Last week my friend Melissa shared something with me on Facebook. A dress. The world’s most perfect dress. I ordered it, because Alex and I had just had this conversation:
Melanie: I have this meeting thingy and I have a speaking thingy and I have nothing to wear besides tank tops and ripped jeans.
Alex: You know what I think? For your birthday month, you need to buy some new clothes. You keep having these things where you need grownup clothes that aren’t tie-dyed. You need something besides spaghetti straps and skirts that blow in the breeze. Don’t come home with a cape. Don’t come home with a bathing suit with wings.
Melanie: This doesn’t sound like shopping. This sounds like a personality transplant.
Alex: No-no. Still Melanie. But grownup Melanie.
Melanie: I can try.
So when Melissa sent me this extremely sophisticated dress I totes ordered it. Look how sophisticated I am. I’m using my No Nonsense Deep Thinking Face as well. I am ready to adult so hard.
Cute pattern, huh?
Let’s get a closer look:
A poo emoji dress. Has there ever been a more perfect article of clothing for me? No, no there has not. So now I have my TV Dress, which looks like I’m ready to pilot the Enterprise, and my Poo Dress, bringing happiness and good fortune to the people around me.
GROWNUPPING LIKE A BOSS.